My hands are a bit dry and cracked because of how much I've washed my hands recently... but, I still caught the bug that Samuel has. Awesome. When he's sick all he wants to do is sit an my lap and caught all over me, or throw up on me, or wipe his buggers on me. Wonderful.
I've had a bit of a fever, and the worst cold ever. It's made sleeping EXTREMELY difficult, but lucky for me, Michael's class today got cancelled and he doesn't have to be in work, so he's here all day with me! So, he kindly let me take a nap this morning, which was awesome because I was actually able to sleep for an hour straight!
Although, because of the lack of sleep, my stomach has started hurting again and I've been really weak, but hopefully I'll be able to catch up on some more sleep today while Samuel is napping and hopefully I'll be able to eat something that will help my stomach calm down. I've had some sprite, and that has helped a little bit, but I just want to feel better. I'm SO TIRED OF BEING SO SICK. I swear, every time I start to feel better, I get some sort of bug from the boys. They've been sick almost the entire time I've been watching them. So, I guess I should count my blessings... I haven't gotten as sick as I could have. I've had to try REALLY hard though to not get sick all the time. Kids are snot balls full of germs. It's gross. I just can't WAIT to have my own little germ ball around... yay!
Anyway, I'm just really glad Michael's class got cancelled. I mean, he probably still would have tried to spend most of the day here, but it's just so much nicer knowing that I don't need to worry about not being able to do something because I'm too weak. Husbands are so nice to have around. :)
Anyway, on Sunday Michael and I got called to be CTR 4 teachers! Woo! We've got 6 little 4 year olds to take care of every Sunday. We've substituted the past little while, so we kind of figured that was what the Bishop wanted to meet with us for... and it was. So we were called and sustained on Sunday. It's HARD. Those little kids are SO HARD to keep their attention span (then again, now we'll have more than 20 minutes prior knowledge to try and prepare a fun lesson with games and other activities). The past few weeks 2 of the kids haven't shown up at all, so we have no idea what they are like. But, this past Sunday we had two VERY difficult children. Man, it'll be fun, but it'll be hard. There is one child than I'm pretty positive he's got some sort of ADD or ADHD. He just CANNOT stop moving, and CANNOT stay focused, no matter what we do, so if he's there will all of the other children, it will be VERY hard. They will ALL get distracted if he's there. Anyway, I'm sure we'll learn a lot, and we're both excited, just a bit nervous.
Also, it will be hard for me, because I'll need to drink/snack during the 2 hours of primary, but I can't snack in front of them... and I can't leave the room during the lesson (both teachers MUST be there at ALL times). So, I'll probably try to sneak out a little bit during sharing time or music time and eat something in the Hallway. We're not allowed to take the kids to the bathroom at all. There is a presidency member that roams the hallways during primary and if a child needs to go to the bathroom, you basically stand at your door and flag them down and they'll go find the child's parent, and their parent has to be the one to take them to the bathroom. There are just so many rules, that are kind of crazy, but that's just what the world has come to. It's sad to think about WHY we have those rules. Apparently in Utah County, they have had A LOT of problems with people coming into the primary and other things. There are even a few members that have been persecuted and imprisoned because they SAW something suspicious and didn't report it. It's just sad that even in the church we have to have such extreme precautions.
A little while ago (I'm not sure if it's still happening or not... but wouldn't be surprised if it is), there was a van traveling between Salt Lake area and Spanish Fork area kidnapping children as they walk to school. In Utah, it's VERY common to see 6 year olds walking to school by themselves (I see it EVERY day when I walk Joseph), because their parents think it's safe because 'everyone' is LDS. But, there are people who will take advantage of Utah and the false sense of security a lot of people have. So anyway, there was a van that would pick a town for a day, and just go around and kidnap children while they were walking to/from school. SCARY. Anyway, it was sighted in many towns/cities and thought to be the same van. How scary would it be to send your child to school, and never see them again?
Anyway, Samuel is hungry (again), so I've got to run.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Friday, January 27, 2012
Nothing to Report Really
Well, I'm sick, again. But, not nearly as bad. I've just got a nasty cold from Joe and Tina's kids... and because of that, I had a TERRIBLE night last night and woke up feeling absolutely miserable. Michael's a little sick too. Woo!
Because of the lack of sleep last night I have had some bad morning sickness all day thus far (either that or I got the flu from somewhere? but, I doubt it because it feels more like morning sickness than flu). Although, I'm starting to do a bit better. Samuel is going to go down for a nap soon, so I'll be able to take a nap too, I hope. I'm just exhausted. I can't wait for tomorrow! I get to sleep in...
but, I supposed really, tomorrow is going to be a cleaning day. It's been hard to keep the apartment clean when both Michael and I are gone all day and I'm ready for bed by the time we get home (at like 6-ish...) and usually I just eat and then hop into bed and Michael does his homework next to me. It's actually worked out pretty nicely so far, aside from the growing mess in the kitchen and other parts of the apartment...
Michael is LOVING his computer science class, and is actually thinking about switching his major to it since it's a shorter major, and he's about as far along in CS as he is in PD Bio..
But, we'll see what he actually ends up doing. I don't really care WHAT he does as long as it is something that he's good at and likes and can support a family off of. We just don't know how his family will react if he decides not to be a doctor (his parents mainly). I mean, they know it's his decision, they'll just try to talk him out of it. They've kind of got their hearts and minds set on him becoming a doctor. But, he could major in CS and still be a doctor if he wanted to. He'll just have to study extra hard for the MCAT because he won't have as many classes to reinforce that knowledge.
Anyway, today is a year from our first date! How fun. Too bad we're both a bit sick. Although, Michael had a good birthday yesterday :)
I couldn't find the present he wanted though... so I'll be doing a bit of shopping around again tomorrow to look some more. It was supposed to be a surprise, but I gave in and told him because I was having a hard time finding what I was going to get him. It's just PJ pants (thick flannel ones). You would think they'd be easy to find, right? Um, no. All the ones in stores are thinner, and he doesn't like those as much. But, we did go out to dinner last night for his birthday, and it was yummy. We were going to go to see Sherlock Holmes afterwards, but we were both just tooo exhausted. Talk about lame-os. We were home by 7 and in bed by 7:30.
Anyway, we had a good day yesterday, and Michael said his birthday was good, so I guess that means even though we were kind of lame, he had a good day. He said I was the best birthday present he ever got (since, apparently, he got me last year for his birthday because it was the first time we ever hung out). Anyway, it's just kind of fun to think we've officially known each other for a year. We've basically spent EVERY day together since a year from yesterday except for 4 days when I was in Denver, and a few days when I was in Pennsylvania for Grandpa Rankin's funeral. CRAZY! Anyway, fun times.
In the past year we've done a bunch of things, but nothing tooo fun to report. Maybe I'll make a list of the cool things we've done later and post it.
Anyway, time for Samuel to take a nap... so that I can! YAY!
On a side note, the past two weeks or so, I haven't grown AT ALL in size... so I'm just stuck in the awkward state that makes you feel fat... You know, when you don't QUITE look pregnant, but you are? and You know you are? Because you're sort of showing, but to everyone else you just look like you've gained 10 pounds? Yeah, talk about awesome. I never thought I'd say this, but I wish I were bigger, so I wasn't so AWKWARD looking. :sigh:
I'm sure I'll be missing this stage of pregnancy soon enough though. Haha
Because of the lack of sleep last night I have had some bad morning sickness all day thus far (either that or I got the flu from somewhere? but, I doubt it because it feels more like morning sickness than flu). Although, I'm starting to do a bit better. Samuel is going to go down for a nap soon, so I'll be able to take a nap too, I hope. I'm just exhausted. I can't wait for tomorrow! I get to sleep in...
but, I supposed really, tomorrow is going to be a cleaning day. It's been hard to keep the apartment clean when both Michael and I are gone all day and I'm ready for bed by the time we get home (at like 6-ish...) and usually I just eat and then hop into bed and Michael does his homework next to me. It's actually worked out pretty nicely so far, aside from the growing mess in the kitchen and other parts of the apartment...
Michael is LOVING his computer science class, and is actually thinking about switching his major to it since it's a shorter major, and he's about as far along in CS as he is in PD Bio..
But, we'll see what he actually ends up doing. I don't really care WHAT he does as long as it is something that he's good at and likes and can support a family off of. We just don't know how his family will react if he decides not to be a doctor (his parents mainly). I mean, they know it's his decision, they'll just try to talk him out of it. They've kind of got their hearts and minds set on him becoming a doctor. But, he could major in CS and still be a doctor if he wanted to. He'll just have to study extra hard for the MCAT because he won't have as many classes to reinforce that knowledge.
Anyway, today is a year from our first date! How fun. Too bad we're both a bit sick. Although, Michael had a good birthday yesterday :)
I couldn't find the present he wanted though... so I'll be doing a bit of shopping around again tomorrow to look some more. It was supposed to be a surprise, but I gave in and told him because I was having a hard time finding what I was going to get him. It's just PJ pants (thick flannel ones). You would think they'd be easy to find, right? Um, no. All the ones in stores are thinner, and he doesn't like those as much. But, we did go out to dinner last night for his birthday, and it was yummy. We were going to go to see Sherlock Holmes afterwards, but we were both just tooo exhausted. Talk about lame-os. We were home by 7 and in bed by 7:30.
Anyway, we had a good day yesterday, and Michael said his birthday was good, so I guess that means even though we were kind of lame, he had a good day. He said I was the best birthday present he ever got (since, apparently, he got me last year for his birthday because it was the first time we ever hung out). Anyway, it's just kind of fun to think we've officially known each other for a year. We've basically spent EVERY day together since a year from yesterday except for 4 days when I was in Denver, and a few days when I was in Pennsylvania for Grandpa Rankin's funeral. CRAZY! Anyway, fun times.
In the past year we've done a bunch of things, but nothing tooo fun to report. Maybe I'll make a list of the cool things we've done later and post it.
Anyway, time for Samuel to take a nap... so that I can! YAY!
On a side note, the past two weeks or so, I haven't grown AT ALL in size... so I'm just stuck in the awkward state that makes you feel fat... You know, when you don't QUITE look pregnant, but you are? and You know you are? Because you're sort of showing, but to everyone else you just look like you've gained 10 pounds? Yeah, talk about awesome. I never thought I'd say this, but I wish I were bigger, so I wasn't so AWKWARD looking. :sigh:
I'm sure I'll be missing this stage of pregnancy soon enough though. Haha
Thursday, January 26, 2012
It's been a year!
Hi all! It's Michael here! Today is my birthday. And as the title suggests there was something that happened a year ago. And not just another birthday, but a memory that I cherish. A year ago I asked Amy on a date and also asked her to spend some time with me on my birthday. I have known my wife for a year now. It is a very odd thing for me to be able to reflect on a relationship that has lasted this long for me and I am so happy it is with the person whom I am married to. I love her so much and am grateful for the things she does for me.
I have always enjoyed the finer things in life and now, as it has been since we both were married, I say that I can always enjoy the finest thing in life--Marriage to Amy.
Today has been slow, as is typical with my birthday. I am just glad that i don't have an exam to write today. I think this is the first year since as long as I can remember. Spending time with Amy, as i learned last year, is a fine alternative.
Amy is laughing at me because I am struggling to find things to say. I do mostly the same things each day. Wake up, Love Amy, go to bed. I am enjoying the things that i am doing in school but i can really honestly say that I am attached to amy. We are both fine with that. I guess that is about as much as I have to write today. Amy will likely post later. sometime. but until then, Love ya!
Michael
I have always enjoyed the finer things in life and now, as it has been since we both were married, I say that I can always enjoy the finest thing in life--Marriage to Amy.
Today has been slow, as is typical with my birthday. I am just glad that i don't have an exam to write today. I think this is the first year since as long as I can remember. Spending time with Amy, as i learned last year, is a fine alternative.
Amy is laughing at me because I am struggling to find things to say. I do mostly the same things each day. Wake up, Love Amy, go to bed. I am enjoying the things that i am doing in school but i can really honestly say that I am attached to amy. We are both fine with that. I guess that is about as much as I have to write today. Amy will likely post later. sometime. but until then, Love ya!
Michael
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Ultrasound... results?
Heh, so only one baby!
that's basically all there is to say? Our baby is big and healthy! Well, it's got a big head for the rest of it's body... according to head size we're about 15.5 weeks pregnant... but the rest of it is about 14.5 weeks pregnant... except for the waist too. Hmm... big headed fat baby?
Haha, well, the technician said it was healthy size and everything was developing properly. We got to see it's little hands and feets! And it's face, which is totally Michael's... haha.
The practice we go to won't tell you their opinion of the sex until it's been 16 weeks... so she didn't tell us what she thought, but we got a pretty good view of the bum, and both Michael and I think it's a girl. But, neither of us are professionals when it comes to ultrasounds...
Anyway, I guess we'll find out in a few weeks! Hey, the gel they put on your tummy, isn't it usually cold? It was totally warm! Like, almost hot warm! Weird. I always thought it was supposed to be cold? Anyway, I'm hungry, and really need food in my tummy, so I'm going to go find something to eat. :)
yes, the ultrasound picture is upside down... i couldn't rotate it. :(
that's basically all there is to say? Our baby is big and healthy! Well, it's got a big head for the rest of it's body... according to head size we're about 15.5 weeks pregnant... but the rest of it is about 14.5 weeks pregnant... except for the waist too. Hmm... big headed fat baby?
Haha, well, the technician said it was healthy size and everything was developing properly. We got to see it's little hands and feets! And it's face, which is totally Michael's... haha.
The practice we go to won't tell you their opinion of the sex until it's been 16 weeks... so she didn't tell us what she thought, but we got a pretty good view of the bum, and both Michael and I think it's a girl. But, neither of us are professionals when it comes to ultrasounds...
Anyway, I guess we'll find out in a few weeks! Hey, the gel they put on your tummy, isn't it usually cold? It was totally warm! Like, almost hot warm! Weird. I always thought it was supposed to be cold? Anyway, I'm hungry, and really need food in my tummy, so I'm going to go find something to eat. :)
yes, the ultrasound picture is upside down... i couldn't rotate it. :(
U/S TODAY!
...it's time to get the boys ready to go with us! We've got our FIRST ultrasound today! AHH! I've got mixed feelings. I'm just pretty sure that whatever happens is going to be the right thing, so it's good, right?
I woke up feeling pretty sick today though :(
And nothing seems to be calming my stomach... ugh. But, it's alright, it's no where near as bad as a month or so ago. I could NOT for the life of me sleep last night though. I woke up at 3AM and my body was ready to be awake for the day. YUCK. So, I laid in bed until 4:30 when I finally was able to fall back to sleep, but it wasn't good sleep. It was super light. :(
Anyway, hopefully I can get a nap today :)
I'll post later about the appointment!
I woke up feeling pretty sick today though :(
And nothing seems to be calming my stomach... ugh. But, it's alright, it's no where near as bad as a month or so ago. I could NOT for the life of me sleep last night though. I woke up at 3AM and my body was ready to be awake for the day. YUCK. So, I laid in bed until 4:30 when I finally was able to fall back to sleep, but it wasn't good sleep. It was super light. :(
Anyway, hopefully I can get a nap today :)
I'll post later about the appointment!
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Anxious Anxious Anxious...
I'm sooo anxious about tomorrow! I'm super excited, but I'm anxious too. What if it's twins?? Or what if something is wrong?
If it's twins, how are we going to manage? I just don't see how it will work. I mean, I'm sure it will all work out somehow, but how? I hate not knowing things... it's scary and stressful.
But, at the same time, I've always wanted twins, so I wouldn't be SAD or anything if we do end up having twins, it'll just be really stressful and I'll have to try and figure out how things are going to work for us before they come! How do you even plan for two? Can they sleep in the same crib for the first little while? or do they need two cribs right away? How am I EVER going to get any sleep? It's not like I can just tell Michael it's his turn to get up and feed them all night... unless we've got a lot of pumped milk stored in the fridge! But then, what am I going to do all day? Pump milk or be feeding or changing diapers? I mean, it's hard enough with one, right? What if I don't produce enough milk for two? I just don't know how ANYTHING is going to work. It's hard enough to figure it all out with your first ONE anyway, right? How am I supposed to do two?
Or what if our child has some sort of medical problem and we just can't afford to take care of it? I mean, I'm sure we'll find a way - somehow, but how? There are just so many things that I can't imagine solutions to. So, I'm anxious about tomorrow. I just hope it all goes well. :)
This time tomorrow I'll be having my u/s! Scary to think about... but super exciting too.
Anyway, I'm wearing my first pair of maternity pants! THEY ARE SOO COMFORTABLE. I was just too uncomfortable yesterday trying to wear my pants unbuttoned and unzipped, so Michael took me to the Motherhood Maternity store in the mall so I could figure out my size (I had no idea how sizes even worked...). So, we bought me one outfit (jeans and a long sleeved shirt) that were on sale and now we're looking on KSL for sweet deals on maternity clothes. Anyway, hopefully we'll find something good on KSL. :)
Michael has to go to school soon, so I guess that means I need to stop using his computer... so he can take it with him.
I'm soooo tired!
If it's twins, how are we going to manage? I just don't see how it will work. I mean, I'm sure it will all work out somehow, but how? I hate not knowing things... it's scary and stressful.
But, at the same time, I've always wanted twins, so I wouldn't be SAD or anything if we do end up having twins, it'll just be really stressful and I'll have to try and figure out how things are going to work for us before they come! How do you even plan for two? Can they sleep in the same crib for the first little while? or do they need two cribs right away? How am I EVER going to get any sleep? It's not like I can just tell Michael it's his turn to get up and feed them all night... unless we've got a lot of pumped milk stored in the fridge! But then, what am I going to do all day? Pump milk or be feeding or changing diapers? I mean, it's hard enough with one, right? What if I don't produce enough milk for two? I just don't know how ANYTHING is going to work. It's hard enough to figure it all out with your first ONE anyway, right? How am I supposed to do two?
Or what if our child has some sort of medical problem and we just can't afford to take care of it? I mean, I'm sure we'll find a way - somehow, but how? There are just so many things that I can't imagine solutions to. So, I'm anxious about tomorrow. I just hope it all goes well. :)
This time tomorrow I'll be having my u/s! Scary to think about... but super exciting too.
Anyway, I'm wearing my first pair of maternity pants! THEY ARE SOO COMFORTABLE. I was just too uncomfortable yesterday trying to wear my pants unbuttoned and unzipped, so Michael took me to the Motherhood Maternity store in the mall so I could figure out my size (I had no idea how sizes even worked...). So, we bought me one outfit (jeans and a long sleeved shirt) that were on sale and now we're looking on KSL for sweet deals on maternity clothes. Anyway, hopefully we'll find something good on KSL. :)
Michael has to go to school soon, so I guess that means I need to stop using his computer... so he can take it with him.
I'm soooo tired!
Friday, January 13, 2012
Okay... for comparison...
So, I've just decided not everyone who reads this really knows how thin I was right before getting pregnant, so I did do myself a favor, and took a picture the day I found out for sure... (so about 3 weeks along).
So here is a picture (I'll have to dig out that shirt and wear it in the next pictures... I just haven't been home when I've taken pictures.) of when I first got pregnant. I had lost a bunch of weight because I was on my feet all day or going up and down stairs or walking around campus because I was going to Cosmo school and BYU at that point... so yes, I was INSANELY skinny.
Man, I remember thinking I was TOO skinny - hah! What I'd give to have that body back! (I doubt I'll fit into those pants (since I don't fit into any really atm...), but I'll put that same outfit on when I get a chance and take a picture. I posted two of them because the first one looks like I'm standing funny because of how skinny I am... but to prove I really was actually that skinny... I posted a picture of me not paying attention to michael while he was just snapping shots.
And here is the one from two weeks ago...
And from today... (and yes, my pants are unbuttoned and unzipped... time to go shopping...)... oh, and My boobs have grown a lot... can you tell? heh...
So here is a picture (I'll have to dig out that shirt and wear it in the next pictures... I just haven't been home when I've taken pictures.) of when I first got pregnant. I had lost a bunch of weight because I was on my feet all day or going up and down stairs or walking around campus because I was going to Cosmo school and BYU at that point... so yes, I was INSANELY skinny.
Man, I remember thinking I was TOO skinny - hah! What I'd give to have that body back! (I doubt I'll fit into those pants (since I don't fit into any really atm...), but I'll put that same outfit on when I get a chance and take a picture. I posted two of them because the first one looks like I'm standing funny because of how skinny I am... but to prove I really was actually that skinny... I posted a picture of me not paying attention to michael while he was just snapping shots.
And here is the one from two weeks ago...
And from today... (and yes, my pants are unbuttoned and unzipped... time to go shopping...)... oh, and My boobs have grown a lot... can you tell? heh...
Random thoughts and a special treat for Michelle. :)
Soooo... since being 'home' from New Jersey, I've been watching Joe and Tina's kids. It's been pretty fun for the most part, but it's also been kind of eye opening. It's helped me kind of get an idea of some of the things I'd like to do with my kids to teach them things as they grow up. It is so fun to sit down and talk with Samuel! He'll just sit and listen sometimes and if I ask him questions he'll give me such a blunt and honest answer - it's great!
I mean, I realize that every child is different and each has to learn things in different ways, but it's still been fun to see a little bit how things are run in a different household and see what I like and what I'd rather do a little differently. Don't get me wrong, Joe and Tina have great things going on in their home, there are just some things I'd do a little differently, and I'm sure Michael has his own ideas as well. Everyone does, don't they? Anyway, who knows what will actually end up happening in my home? I'll probably change my ideas/opinions as I go anyway, isn't that what is supposed to happen? You learn as you go? What I guess I'm really trying to say, is it's been fun to see what other people have done because it helps me get my mind going and helps me to start thinking about silly little things that I probably wouldn't have before the situation actually arose in my own family.
I guess in some ways, I can not WAIT to have this baby, but in others I am absolutely terrified. I just have to remember that God wants me to have this baby, at this time, right now in my life. Since being pregnant I've had to do a lot of praying in order to be okay with different things happening in my life right now. I was just in the process of switching career paths... and now, who even knows what will end up happening? I mean, I still intend to get my cosmetology license, but if we have twins or if we have a child that has some sort of special needs, I doubt I'll be able to. I'm just really anxious about what is going to happen to me in my life. Am I really going to be a stay at home all day, house cleaning, mom at age 20? It's not exactly what I had planned... Heck, a year ago, there is NO WAY I would have THOUGHT it was POSSIBLE to even by married by now... much less carrying our first child. Things have just happened so fast it's scary. And so much of it was not in my plans, but I guess God really does have his own plans for us. As I said, since being pregnant I've done a lot of praying (like 10 times as much!) and I've just started to stop complaining to God about everything. Well, complaining isn't necessarily the right word, it's more like worrying... but each time I worry about something, something happens in my life that reassures me that things really will be okay and that this wasn't just some mistake - it really was meant to be. Don't get me wrong, I'm still scared as heck and nervous about having a precious life in MY hands. A life that cannot have a chance without ME there to take care of it. I'm going to be a mom. And I guess the past few days it's really stated to settle in. I'm not sure if it's being back in Utah that's done it, or having to help Joseph and Samuel everyday. I've just been thinking a lot about everything and it's all really starting to sink in.
It's just all going to be so hard with Michael in school. In so many ways I'm just scared I'll feel like a single mom... especially when Michael goes to Med School. How am I supposed to help pay for his tuition (as much as possible) and raise a family? Before, I thought we really could do it, and now, I'm just scared. I know Michael is smart enough, and I know he's dedicated enough and committed enough, but am I strong enough?
Anyway, mom gave me the book "Lighten Up" for Christmas and basically made me promise to read it. So, I picked it up today and started reading it while Samuel was napping (instead of taking a nap myself... kind of a mistake, but I don't know when else I'll have time to read!) and read the first 7 chapters. It's pretty good. I mostly like the stories in it. I've always liked books with spiritual stories in them. Just story after story, but this one is little different because the stories are more embedded within the text. I can't help but think part of the time how she uses different writing skills in her book... (is that absolutely disgusting or what?). I hated english classes when I had to take them, but now I'm stuck thinking about them? YUCK. It's a well written book, but there are some typos... more than other books I've read... so it kind of gets annoying... but not too much. Anyway, I've kinda meandered in topic. What I was going to say, is it's a good book for the most part. It's not really my type of book, but it is uplifting and there are some really good things said. I'd recommend it to other LDS women for sure, and Michael will be reading it whenever he gets a change (maybe over the summer?). It's a good book for anyone to read really, but it's definitely geared toward an LDS audience (women in particular, but would be good for men too). There are just a lot of things said in there that aren't really said other places, but need to be. Both to women and to men.
Anyway...I've got to go check on Samuel and make sure he's still alright napping, and I should probably get Joseph off of the wii... I let him play when he got home from school because Samuel was trying to nap and it was the only quieter thing he wanted to do.
Oh yeah, I almost forgot, here you go Michelle!
So, that is an absolutely terrible picture of me, and pretty terrible quality (my phone isn't super high tech or anything...), don't you think I should have napped today? And to think, I got 10 hours of sleep last night... Oh well, at least it's Friday, which means tomorrow is SATURDAY! Anyway, the angle isn't super good, and my shirt isn't super tight or anything, but as you can see, I'm looking quite... well, I feel quite FAT. I feel huge and disgusting. I think this is the biggest I've been my whole life.
This was taken today, so to my knowledge thus far I am 12 weeks and about 5 days pregnant, but I'll find out for sure next Wednesday! Speaking of... I've got to go get some blood work done tomorrow... and set up my next actual doctors appointment... woot!
Anyway, I really should be going! buh bye!
I mean, I realize that every child is different and each has to learn things in different ways, but it's still been fun to see a little bit how things are run in a different household and see what I like and what I'd rather do a little differently. Don't get me wrong, Joe and Tina have great things going on in their home, there are just some things I'd do a little differently, and I'm sure Michael has his own ideas as well. Everyone does, don't they? Anyway, who knows what will actually end up happening in my home? I'll probably change my ideas/opinions as I go anyway, isn't that what is supposed to happen? You learn as you go? What I guess I'm really trying to say, is it's been fun to see what other people have done because it helps me get my mind going and helps me to start thinking about silly little things that I probably wouldn't have before the situation actually arose in my own family.
I guess in some ways, I can not WAIT to have this baby, but in others I am absolutely terrified. I just have to remember that God wants me to have this baby, at this time, right now in my life. Since being pregnant I've had to do a lot of praying in order to be okay with different things happening in my life right now. I was just in the process of switching career paths... and now, who even knows what will end up happening? I mean, I still intend to get my cosmetology license, but if we have twins or if we have a child that has some sort of special needs, I doubt I'll be able to. I'm just really anxious about what is going to happen to me in my life. Am I really going to be a stay at home all day, house cleaning, mom at age 20? It's not exactly what I had planned... Heck, a year ago, there is NO WAY I would have THOUGHT it was POSSIBLE to even by married by now... much less carrying our first child. Things have just happened so fast it's scary. And so much of it was not in my plans, but I guess God really does have his own plans for us. As I said, since being pregnant I've done a lot of praying (like 10 times as much!) and I've just started to stop complaining to God about everything. Well, complaining isn't necessarily the right word, it's more like worrying... but each time I worry about something, something happens in my life that reassures me that things really will be okay and that this wasn't just some mistake - it really was meant to be. Don't get me wrong, I'm still scared as heck and nervous about having a precious life in MY hands. A life that cannot have a chance without ME there to take care of it. I'm going to be a mom. And I guess the past few days it's really stated to settle in. I'm not sure if it's being back in Utah that's done it, or having to help Joseph and Samuel everyday. I've just been thinking a lot about everything and it's all really starting to sink in.
It's just all going to be so hard with Michael in school. In so many ways I'm just scared I'll feel like a single mom... especially when Michael goes to Med School. How am I supposed to help pay for his tuition (as much as possible) and raise a family? Before, I thought we really could do it, and now, I'm just scared. I know Michael is smart enough, and I know he's dedicated enough and committed enough, but am I strong enough?
Anyway, mom gave me the book "Lighten Up" for Christmas and basically made me promise to read it. So, I picked it up today and started reading it while Samuel was napping (instead of taking a nap myself... kind of a mistake, but I don't know when else I'll have time to read!) and read the first 7 chapters. It's pretty good. I mostly like the stories in it. I've always liked books with spiritual stories in them. Just story after story, but this one is little different because the stories are more embedded within the text. I can't help but think part of the time how she uses different writing skills in her book... (is that absolutely disgusting or what?). I hated english classes when I had to take them, but now I'm stuck thinking about them? YUCK. It's a well written book, but there are some typos... more than other books I've read... so it kind of gets annoying... but not too much. Anyway, I've kinda meandered in topic. What I was going to say, is it's a good book for the most part. It's not really my type of book, but it is uplifting and there are some really good things said. I'd recommend it to other LDS women for sure, and Michael will be reading it whenever he gets a change (maybe over the summer?). It's a good book for anyone to read really, but it's definitely geared toward an LDS audience (women in particular, but would be good for men too). There are just a lot of things said in there that aren't really said other places, but need to be. Both to women and to men.
Anyway...I've got to go check on Samuel and make sure he's still alright napping, and I should probably get Joseph off of the wii... I let him play when he got home from school because Samuel was trying to nap and it was the only quieter thing he wanted to do.
Oh yeah, I almost forgot, here you go Michelle!
So, that is an absolutely terrible picture of me, and pretty terrible quality (my phone isn't super high tech or anything...), don't you think I should have napped today? And to think, I got 10 hours of sleep last night... Oh well, at least it's Friday, which means tomorrow is SATURDAY! Anyway, the angle isn't super good, and my shirt isn't super tight or anything, but as you can see, I'm looking quite... well, I feel quite FAT. I feel huge and disgusting. I think this is the biggest I've been my whole life.
This was taken today, so to my knowledge thus far I am 12 weeks and about 5 days pregnant, but I'll find out for sure next Wednesday! Speaking of... I've got to go get some blood work done tomorrow... and set up my next actual doctors appointment... woot!
Anyway, I really should be going! buh bye!
Monday, January 9, 2012
Updates!
So, I changed my ultrasound from today to next wednesday. It was just too crazy trying to figure everything out with Michael starting school and me watching Joe and Tina's kids. Although, next Wednesday Michael and I will probably bring Joseph and Samuel with us, which might actually be kind of fun. If they don't want to see pictures of our baby, then they can play in the nursurey type area. So, that'll be fine.
Yesterday Michael and I taught CTR 4s in church. I got a phone call about ten minutes before church asking if I could help the teacher out, but when we got to church, the teacher didn't show up, so Michael and I got to teach the class. We read through and learned the lesson during sharing time...
So, it was a little hectic trying to figure everything out and make sure we had some supplies, but it was really fun. There were only two of them, and one was VERY well behaved. It was kind of scary. I don't think I've ever seen a 4 year old so well-behaved in church before. He was just the sweetest cutest thing! Then, the other one was a nightmare... haha, but thankfully Michael was able to do pretty well with him. He just needed someone's full undivided attention. So he sat in Michael's lap most of the time and wanted to talk about what he got for Christmas.
Anyway, the lesson was on Choosing the Right and what that means. Basically, choosing the right means making good choices, and when you make good choices you are happy because you are following God's plan. It was fun, and we even had a snack for them! (thanks to me being pregnant...haha). We gave them each a packet of fruit snacks at the end of class. The Primary President is VERY nice. It was the first time I had met her, and I was very impressed with her. I just don't quite understand why she called me... I guess she was just going down the ward list and Evanson is near the top? Haha.
Anyway, I think it would be a lot of fun for Michael and I to be teachers in Jr. Primary, but that won't happen. I don't plan on getting a calling in our ward, since I'm pregnant... and people who are pregnant in UT don't really get callings... and if they had one, they get released. At least, that's how our ward is...
Although, they don't know I'm pregnant yet (they might have a feeling though because of how I look.. but I could just be getting fat too, right?)
Yeah, I'm not quite sure when to tell my ward, or even HOW to tell my ward... Should I just not tell them and then they'll say something once I am finally undeniably pregnant? Haha... I don't know.
Anyway, it's nap time for me... so I really should go sleep :)
Yesterday Michael and I taught CTR 4s in church. I got a phone call about ten minutes before church asking if I could help the teacher out, but when we got to church, the teacher didn't show up, so Michael and I got to teach the class. We read through and learned the lesson during sharing time...
So, it was a little hectic trying to figure everything out and make sure we had some supplies, but it was really fun. There were only two of them, and one was VERY well behaved. It was kind of scary. I don't think I've ever seen a 4 year old so well-behaved in church before. He was just the sweetest cutest thing! Then, the other one was a nightmare... haha, but thankfully Michael was able to do pretty well with him. He just needed someone's full undivided attention. So he sat in Michael's lap most of the time and wanted to talk about what he got for Christmas.
Anyway, the lesson was on Choosing the Right and what that means. Basically, choosing the right means making good choices, and when you make good choices you are happy because you are following God's plan. It was fun, and we even had a snack for them! (thanks to me being pregnant...haha). We gave them each a packet of fruit snacks at the end of class. The Primary President is VERY nice. It was the first time I had met her, and I was very impressed with her. I just don't quite understand why she called me... I guess she was just going down the ward list and Evanson is near the top? Haha.
Anyway, I think it would be a lot of fun for Michael and I to be teachers in Jr. Primary, but that won't happen. I don't plan on getting a calling in our ward, since I'm pregnant... and people who are pregnant in UT don't really get callings... and if they had one, they get released. At least, that's how our ward is...
Although, they don't know I'm pregnant yet (they might have a feeling though because of how I look.. but I could just be getting fat too, right?)
Yeah, I'm not quite sure when to tell my ward, or even HOW to tell my ward... Should I just not tell them and then they'll say something once I am finally undeniably pregnant? Haha... I don't know.
Anyway, it's nap time for me... so I really should go sleep :)
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